” Nobody is perfect in the world. Yet to me, you are.”

Its funny the things we think of, when our minds start to wander off with our emotions.  

Thrice- A Song For Milly Michaelson

“A Song For Milly Michaelson”

Well you know I hardly speak
When I do, it’s just for you
I haven’t said a word in weeks
Cause they’ve been keepin’ me from you

There’s a way where there’s a will
You know I got no need for stairs
Step out on the window sill
Fall with me into the air

Here we go, hold on tight and don’t let go
I won’t ever let you fall
I love the night, flying over these city lights
But I love you most of all

And there’s something you should know
Girl you should have died that day
and you fell reaching for the rose
but baby I was there to save you

So, here we go, hold on tight and don’t let go
I won’t ever let you fall
I love the night, flying over these city lights
But I love you most of all

Here we go, hold on tight and don’t let go
I won’t ever let you fall
I love the night, flying over these city lights
But I love you most of all


I know I can bring light to your eyes with just one hug.
Just one warm embrace is what you yearn for.
Yet, darkness and the chains of resentment still gets a hold of you.

I see you fight with all the potential of your heart.
For your loved ones, you’ll die for.
Even if they won’t in return.

Your undying love is dangerous.
But it keeps you alive.
To live life with pain is better than not feeling at all.

Don’t mind me. It’s cheating.

To cheat. The very thoughtless act of betrayal where lustful stupidity takes over the mind and body of a person.
Men cheat.
Women cheat. Yet I can’t help but say that I get so much more upset to hear that a female has cheated.
Oh yeah, they say its not right. Something about double standards. Okay. But see I don’t mean to get technical here.
Cheating for me is an act that DUMB people do. Just plain stupid. Now, I hate to say it but men cheating is normal for me.
thing is. i have witnessed the mindset of a cheater. the way he planned his things. how he chose his prey. the tactics to keep sucking on that prey till they die from his pleasure. at a point, its pretty smart. but anyone who does that are idiots at the same time. The biggest idiot? The person who falls into the predator’s traps.

Every woman has a small detector to warn them of such danger. It’s up to the woman to take heed to the warning. Some women have turned off their detector, others just don’t listen and fall into temptation.

I realized that I put women on a much higher level than men. I think of women better than men when it comes to fidelity….and even intellectually. I don’t know why
As I have been living, I see that some women just tend to lose their common sense.

A female is not supposed to cheat Because they are supposed to know better. They are supposed to be better than men.
Unfortunately, it seems like females are just getting way out of control with their power.
I mean, nowadays there is just so much promiscuity, stupidity and other things that girls do that it beats the things that some men do. It just some times makes me ashamed to even be a female. No screw it, never. It just gets me angry that they are females.

Girls please leave the stupidity to the men.

( and guys…. you are clever F’rs)

Happy New Years!



Today the best part of my New Years was spending time with him.
I don’t say this because I’m in love, but because I realized that as our commitment towards eachother got stronger, the bond between my family was broken. Yeah no sadder New Years than having your mom reject your hug.
BUT these are just some pictures. Forgive me for my double chin… It tends to say hi.

Morning time ramble

So I’m going to see my boyfriend in a couple of hours & yet I can’t sleep. I was expecting to sleep until 11, just so the beginning of my day can go by faster.

But no. Here I am, more awake than a cat on catnip ( I don’t know if that’s even true). I am tired but I can’t sleep. I have all of these thoughts that are about him, about my life, about the things I want to do.

I tend to plan things for my future during these times and do ” what ifs”. As in for example, ” what if I transfer to L.A, get a job, get a place with him & then we will be living happily ever after”. Or ” what if I just get a job now, rent a place with him, and just let my parents hate me for it…it’s certainly do-able”. Then finally, ” what if I just ran away.”
But I’m not an idiot. What $ do I have to even live on. I have a future to work for.
Call me crazy for saying this, but, right now the things I do are for my kids.
No I’m not pregnant. But for when I have my kids later in life, I want them to have a comfortable life. I want to tell them, that I and their father completed college. Every choice I do now is for them.
If it wasn’t for them, I would have already ran away and live off of a retail job with some loser who aspires to be nothing.
I admit it, I am a dreamer. I am also with a dreamer. Together we will make our dreams come true.
Want to know something funny? My father is in denial about my relationship. After seeing my Christmas gift, he was worried that this was something serious.
If I leave my home, it will be because of that. I need a job. I’m going to get a job. And I’m going to get A’s in all of my classes in the upcoming semester. These are my new year goals. YES.

Okay, that’s definitely enough. I have put every thought in here. Do you see what I must put up with? What’s worse, it’s not even closed to finish. Blah.

A mother’s love and her person within

When a mother loves her child, it’s the most strongest love one could ever have. It is eternal. Knowing she has to live for that child, she prepares and devotes herself to raising the child right.
The child grows and that outcome will determine the mother’s quality. Anything wrong with the child, best believe the blame will be on the mother.
Mothers are forgotten to be mortal women. They are still plain janes, except that now they have a bigger responsibility. But they are still women with emotions, pasts, thoughts, desires, and wishes.
Many complain about women’s sensitivity and somewhere along the road it’s believed that just because they have children, they will automatically hide their inner sorrows & focus on their children. No. That’s not the case.
People in general vary with experiences. They might have had a Terrible childhood, unfortunate memories of their past, so they know nothing on raising a little one.
Mothers with a sad past will try their hardest to give the opposite experience to their children. There will be some that fail at this and without knowing give then the exact experience. Others will succeed at giving something different.
Now, no mother will be perfect at this. The past can haunt an individual, one can never forget. The negativity will slip out on the family members and can give quite an impact. It all depends on the mothers to try to stop it from coming out but it’s the rest of the family that needs to understand why. And with this they can cope and help her out.
Mothers are sometimes taken for granted. One should always say ” thank you”. And mean it. Truly appreciate everything that your mother has done for you. This can also go for the father. They, like mothers, carryall of the worries of the world on their back. Truly love the one that’s always there for you. if they have made mistakes, remember that they are human and humans are never perfect. But their love is forever.

Girl just want to have fun?

College has been very fulfilling in understanding myself with others. I now know that I am different than most females…and well everyone there.
There’s this guy I met and he could go so far with his potential yet he does not take advantage of it. He is one of those guys who didn’t have much social success in high school and was pretty impacted by it. Anyways, as he threw questions ( literally threw like dodge balls, just kept coming right at me) in an attempt to getting to know me, he wondered why I wasn’t into the whole party-get drunk-everyone-is-my-friend scene. Meanwhile, I wondered why was he so into trying to convince me to go places.

Another classmate who was female and I was forced to work with, was also into socializing. Then half of my pre-calc class found it more enjoyable embracing their bad grades together with the reward of newfound friendship that lasted the semester.

Don’t get me wrong, I loved the whole party idea. In highschool.
Just like my little friend back there, I didn’t have much social success In High school but I didn’t mind mind. I am a very reserved person. Ever hear get to know some one then see how they actually are? Well that’s me. I have heard that people thought I was a “bitch”. Not approachable. Yet those that are close to me and know me, adore me.

Even thought to most females I wasn’t liked, with boys it was different. They wanted to get a taste. But being how I am, they did not… Well, there was Italy but it was a minor kiss kiss thing. Blame it on the booze.
Despite that incident, recently my boyfriend told me that the boys called me ” boring” because I never ” played” the games that my big -breasted-flirtatious-gullible-naive-back-then ” bestie” fell for. To them, she was tons of fun.

I’m fine with that. No. I’m incredibly proud of that.

I may have been boring as they say but I knew I was respected.

I am not a whore.

Soooo in college, I probably will seem like a prude. Even though I am a really nice person.
I have also realized that there is just so much stupidity in college. Not intellectually wise but just their choices And thoughts are just so dumb. I have encountered many and I just found them To be unbearable.

I’m a nice person, I swear I am.

This Christmas

Some girls may have received jewelry this Christmas, it’s something that is believed to be the ideal gift for a female.
Not, I. Not at the moment.
Last Christmas, I received a Versace perfume from my dear boyfriend. Clearly, he did not know who I was. I appreciated it but wasn’t agonizingly happy. He on the other hand, thought that I would be ecstatic over it. Apparently, the females he surrounded himself with are into that whole bag, perfume, jewelry scene. Like I said, he did not know me.
I always say its the thought that counts, & my dear friends he put in a lot of thought in the epiphone acoustic guitar he gave me.
I cried. Yes I was a little bitch, but they were tears of joy. I couldn’t believe my luck with this man as I held the guitar.
I wrote it in his card & I truly meant when I said that his love is the best gift I would ever recieve.